Episode 8 - SVW Tapes - 17th March, 1980

Well, good morning, y'all. It's the Irish Day today, March 17th, and everybody's wearing green. Even Matthew came over in a green T-shirt and a little badge that said, "Think Green". And there's all kinds of jokes on the radio. Mayor Byrne's having Kennedy up to Chicago today to walk through the streets and celebrate St. Patrick's Day. When asked why she didn't ask the president, she simply said, "Well, apart from the fact she doesn't support the president," she's supporting Kennedy, "that he's Irish, he's Catholic, and she's supporting him anyway." And the joke this morning, Ross and Wilson, our radio broadcasters, are joking that it's going to be snowing in Chicago today, supposedly. That makes the ground very slippery, and as Mayor Byrne sublimely hoped... but they're not crossing any bridges.

Anyway, he's still in the race. As you've probably heard, the whole thing gets more and more ridiculous. He's got to be so thick-skinned, that man, it's just unbelievable. Anyway, it looks like Carter will probably get back in, certainly as strong as he ever will be. Anyway, I just decided that today I had to get this tape made. It was the last thing I do, and it may well be. I just don't seem to... I don't know where the days go, really. We just seem to be flat out all the time. I don't know, and yet not getting... I have still not done as much with the house as I would like to have done. But we seem to be very busy. The whole week is taken care of. Monday nights Rachael has gymnastics. Tuesday we have soccer practice. Wednesday is our one free night, which we tend to do shopping and go to Jellybeans or whatever. Thursday night is choir, of course, and Friday night is soccer again. On Saturday, we've got two different soccer games at two different fields, so as you can see... and then Sundays, of course, it's church again, and we've got the work to do in the garden and supposedly redecorating this house. And I just... oh, then cleaning campers as well and so on. Last week I cleaned... oh, about 11 campers. I got $110 bucks for just a couple of afternoons' work, which wasn't a bad deal. It's certainly a good look... you know, well worth having. At the moment, they're quite busy because summer's coming on.

Anyway, so where were we? I haven't heard from you since I last made a tape, no. So there were a few things that I meant to mention. I can't think what they were now, as usual. Now, what have we been up to? Oh, cleaning campers last week was funny. I think it was Thursday, and I had just one or two more to do. And I picked up the kids from... whatever we were in the motor show? Or it might have been Wednesday it was. And we went back to the place and with the kids and picked up John, and he came to help. We had to steam clean some carpets. And Ward, the chap that owns the place, he said, "Oh," he said, "where's Rachael?" And she came along. He said, "Oh, do you know who had this camper for the last two weeks?" And Shaun Cassidy had had the camper. And we found a nice hairbrush, one of those very expensive sort of varieties with the special kind of bristles, which she has now, the proud owner of, and tells everybody it belonged to Shaun Cassidy. And a little bottle of perfume and some Coca-Cola, you know, throwaway cups and some plastic spoons. And Ward said to her, "Well, here? These are Shaun Cassidy's personal cups on his silverware." So the kids last weekend had a little picnic with the kids next door, so they were drunk out of Shaun Cassidy's Coca-Cola glasses. She got quite excited. As Rachael had had a T-shirt with Shaun Cassidy on, I don't think she was all that impressed. But now that she's actually been in the camper he was in for two weeks, she was quite excited.

What else has been happening? Soccer is just a bundle of joy. We've just... the season has just started. They have two seasons: they have a fall and a spring. And of course, we're beginning the spring season. We're running two teams at the moment, both called Grease Lightning. Rachael's really quite good at soccer. And we've just had all the shirts printed with the names and everything. And of course, I've been chargeable... get this shirt. And go... by the time you get all the sizes of each boy right, and the number that the kid wants, and then the names spelt right. And of course, they all have nicknames here. So they always have their nickname on the shirt. By the time you get everybody organized and then get a dollar thirty from each mother to pay for the printing, and God knows what, it was just... down at the soccer field the other night. And Rachael was doing special practices for the Chorister's Guild Spring Festival last weekend, which was most enjoyable. And I don't know. We've just been... the days seem to go.

Where the weather's perking up, you know, I think last time I made the tape, we just had our second snowstorm for the season, which was very exciting for the children. The snow that time was more powdery and much more enjoyable. And but after that, the weather has got a lot better. We've had a bit of rain. It's quite mild now. We don't need any heating on. And the spring flowers are just everywhere. The... officially spring starts on Thursday, but the daffodils are all over the place, just popping up wildly, and hyacinths and all kinds of flowers are popping out now. Trees are starting to get buds on shortly. I would say within a matter of two or three weeks, everything will be green again and stopping... very nice.

What else has been happening? Well, last weekend was quite fun. On the Saturday, Rachael... she'd been practicing for this festival at the Choristers' Guild Festival, and it was all the choirs around Atlanta. I think there were 14 of them were in this thing. I'll send you a program, but you, of course, you'll look on the back, and you'll see that the 14 choirs were mostly Methodist and Baptist and Presbyterian. I believe there was only one Episcopalian Church involved, which, of course, was Holy Innocents, and guess who got left off the program, much to Meredith Green's disgust. The Rachael's choir director, she was most unhappy about it. Of course, they made an announcement, but that doesn't quite make up for the fact that your name is not in print on the program. Anyway, she had to practice Friday night for that, so she missed soccer practice. By the time I got to soccer and to choir and everything else, we were running around like fleas in fits. And on the Saturday morning at 10 o'clock, she had to go, and they started practicing. And they had a sack lunch. And at 2:30, the public were allowed to come. And don't cry, but during the week, Rachael said to me, "Oh, I wish Nana was here." And I said, "Well, I know, darling, but..." Anyway, I said, "Marsha's coming, and Mrs. Curley is coming, and..." Well, they both didn't. Marsha, I had to go and pick up, and she came, and she really enjoyed it. Well, she said she did. It really was nice. They had a proper service. Marsha and I were not altogether popular with the two ladies in front of us, who were obviously staunch Baptists. First of all, I had gotten them there at about 12 to help the robing and everything. And Rachael had said to me, "I'm glad I'm not a Baptist." She said, "Have you seen the robes they wear?" And they're really god... big heavy silk things and burgundy and gold, they've been white. They looked like Ku Klux Klaners. Our little girls looked cute in their bright red and white. I think they looked the most innocent of all, and they looked cute. But there were 300 kids in this thing. Choirs all over the place, and they'd learned all the same songs. Well, they made it into a full service, and I was going to tape the whole thing for you. And of course, I get down there, and I'm in a mad rush all morning to get organized and get Rachael there and Maitland to where he was going... or he stayed the night with Matthew, but I had to check on him and so on. And... I get batteries for the tape recorder, which I haven't used on battery for a long time because I've been able to plug it in here. I get down there and try it out, and it wouldn't go on batteries. So I tried it out with the... the... electricity, and I'd taken the cord with me, and it worked. So there was just something wrong with the connection between the battery operation, which was infuriating. I finally found a plug outside of the doors, and the acoustics in the building were so good, I could have taped, but that plug, the only one that was in the vicinity of reaching the room, I couldn't... was in the main sanctuary. And Rachael had told us, you know, that it was just beautiful. It had a big chandelier, and it did, it was very nice. So I couldn't plug it in. And so I decided when I went to pick up Marsha that I would just buy another lot of batteries, all at great expense. These batteries are so expensive. And I rushed and got another lot of batteries just to be sure that it wasn't the battery. And Marsha and I were sitting in our pew, all finally settled down. I've got the tape recorder and everything else. We were fiddling around pulling batteries out of packets before the thing started, of course, and fiddling around. And these two women in front started giving us the over-the-shoulder glare, you see. And Marcisha got the giggles, and you know, I mean, one glare is enough, but when you get two or three, you start getting a-giggling. And then we still couldn't get the tape to go. Finally, we gave that all up in disgust. But these women kept turning around. Then we read the program, and we noticed that they were having a collection, which we thought wasn't fair on the nose... and that sent us into more giggles. And then, of course, Mrs. Curley turns up, and she had wanted to see Rachael beforehand, and I don't know whether you saw the... ice hockey game? Of course, you know the Americans are all just bananas over the fact that the hockey team won. And you possibly saw that game, but at the end of the game, one of the big players turned round, and you could see him say, "Where's my dad?" you know, when he'd won. Well, when I told Marcia about this, Mrs. Curley had called... I'd called her in the morning to tell her what time exactly that they were singing, and she said, "No, I've got to get there early because I've got to see Rachael before she goes on." She said, "To alleviate the anticipation." She said, "I know what it's like. Rachael must know I'm there, or she'll be looking for me, and that'll distract her, and it's just not good, and dirty dear, and I must see her beforehand." So she said, "I know you're busy, so I'll find her," and so on and so forth. Well, I had to go and pick up Marsha at two, and Rachael was in the room being gowned at that time, and Mrs. Curley still wasn't there. And I said to Rachael, "Now wait here till Mrs. Curley gets here, and I'll go get Marsha," which was just a couple of minutes away. "I'll be five minutes. You wait here." When I got back, they'd obviously been told they had to go up to the fellowship room, which was upstairs. Rachael had gone up. So I placed Marcia in the sanctuary, and I rushed out and went up to the fellowship room, and I couldn't find Rachael anywhere. And then she comes rushing up. She said, "I've seen Mrs. Curley." She said, "I snuck out twice, and I finally saw her," and everything was fine. And when I was telling Marcia about this business of Mrs. Curley seeing Rachael before the program, she said, "Oh, I can just picture her," you know, created this thing of "Where's my dad?" for the hockey game, and I've got no laugh. Anyway, so then I go and rejoined Marsha and Mrs. Curley, and I hadn't seen her because Rachael had been ducking and diving up and down the stairs, and I hadn't seen Mrs. Curley. And then, so on and so forth. And I get into the church in the sanctuary, and this is the Second Ponce de Leon Baptist Church, by the way. Huge, huge church. And I see Mrs. Curley but one row in front of us. Marcisha and I, of course, you know, and everything, and she's looking around and saying, "Which side's Rachael gonna come down?" and so on and so forth. Well, this really got these women going, and they kept glaring at us. Well, Marsha and I just... it got more and more ridiculous. And this woman that was... one of the two women had dandruff all over the back of her. And I... next time she looked around, I'm going to say, "What a terrible shame it must be to have such severe dandruff falling." Marcia just couldn't hardly contain herself. So anyway, but Rachael was just so cute, and all these choir kids, they'd split them, mixed them all up, and there were 300 of them all in their... you know, all singing together, and they just looked really cute.

Well, John popped along at one point and took photographs, so hopefully, we've got some photographs of the whole thing. And Meredith Green, the choir director, thinks that the Choristers' Guild have taped the whole thing, so I may well get a tape of it anyway. It's about an hour, and they were really cute, the kids. So that was a busy day for Rachael, and that finished at about four. And Marsha took us back to Baskin Robbins and shouted Rachael a double-decker ice cream. We dropped her off home, and then we came back, and Rachael was really tired because she'd been standing since 10 o'clock in the morning. And so I made her have a rest because at six o'clock, she was going down to the 'Y' to the basketball social, if you please! Eight years of age going to a social! And next day, I said to her, "How many kids were there?" She said, "Well, we had 200 McDonald's hamburgers." The 'Y' bought 200 hamburgers, and so you can imagine how many kids were there. And they had swim and games and all kinds of things, and that lasted, I think, it was from 6 to 8:30, good till nine or something. John went down and got her. She was really tired. Wonder she could even get up to go to church yesterday.

Let me see how things are going. Well, that's the 'Y', very good with these children. They really do an awful lot with them. There were a couple of things I missed out about the Second Ponce de Leon Baptist Church. It's an enormous building, and it has all kinds of other buildings behind it because they have a lot of social life, you know, the Baptist church. I mean, that's where they go Saturday nights and so on. So it takes up a good block right on Peachtree. And anyway, it's all painted white, absolutely white. And Marsha and I, as we were walking into it, Marsha's church is nearby, she's an Anglican, and Walter is a Catholic, and their churches... all the churches are on a corner, you know, this is the area that she comes to. She said, "My goodness." And we both agreed this looked just like a hospital. And inside, it's all white too. Everything is just all white, and these big crystal chandeliers, isn't... Marsha and I both decided that this building had been exercised and was completely clear. And finally, the next day, John said to me, "God, that church is like a hospital, isn't it?" Because he'd popped in to take photographs. He'd popped out of the garden just to run down with his camera, you know. He had a T-shirt on, and he was upstairs in the balcony. I saw him wink. And I said to Rachael, "Did you see Daddy?" And she said, "Yes, he was running around upstairs." She'd seen him go from one side to the other at this church? Oh dear, whatever.

Anyway, Rachael had her social, and Maitland had stayed the night with Matthew. He's got this little friend, Matthew, next door, you know, and him and Matthew are great mates. He stayed... this is his third time that he has stayed the night with Matthew, and he counts up the times. And he said to me on Saturday, Sunny had said she'd take care of him all day with all this going on with the church and everything. And he came to me, and he said, "Mummy, you miss Green?" Ms Green, she's green too, not to be confused with Meredith Green of the choir director. This is Sunny Green, the neighbor. And he said to me, "Mummy, you and Ms Green share me?" Because I'd said, "We miss you, boy." You know, the first night he stayed there, Sunny's, you know, got great patience with children, rather too much, you know. They sort of take... if you're talking to Sunny and the kids interrupt, she never goes on; she listens to them with open ears to the point that I think is, you know, ridiculous. But anyway, she's awful good with kids 'cause Maitland gets lots of attention. First night he stayed, she said to him the next morning, she figured he probably hadn't been away from home, you know, in a long time. And she said to him, "Maitland, have you ever stayed away from your mother and father for the night? You know, have you ever stayed away from home for the night before?" And he said, "Yes." He said, "Yes, once last night." Chick on the... you know. Now he's counting up, this third night he stayed at Matthew's. And they're both really good, you know. They get to bed, and they listen to one tape, and then they turn it off and go to sleep. Matthew's got every game you can imagine, so they have lots of fun to do. And apparently, Sunny was saying the first night he stayed the night, she goes in and tucks Matthew in, and she just tucked Maitland in, and he snuggled over. And the second night he stayed, he was lying on his tummy, and she just gave him a weak kiss on the cheek, and you know, he was sort of snuggled down anyway. And then on Saturday night, she said he was flat on his back, and he gave her a big hug and a kiss. So he's really good news to Sunny. I said, "Do you want the permanent toothbrush and the rest of the clothes in over?" He's just as happy as a clam over there. And Amanda loves having a playmate his age. Maitland, when she's just that much younger. And Sunny took them out to the... to the Chattahoochee Nature Center Park the other day, on the Saturday when we were at the choir. I think they had the time of their lives.

Anyway, what else is news? Well, things out at... I'm still working for Bob, for Bobber, but one day a week, which is good. I just do the book... I usually go out there one day. I usually do the laundry and stuff out there that day. And the things in John's office... I can't remember as to which date... I'm two weeks behind in my diary. If I don't get caught up with that tonight, I'll just... you'll probably never write it again. You know what it's like once you get behind. So I'm just sort of having to remember what we've been doing. And I can't remember at what point I'd got to with John, you know, and out at work there. I think I... the religious outfit, you know, left. And then there was the problem with the Continental, which is now going to be a court case. And then the... the new company was called J&J, which is Jack and Jesus. Bought it up, and then they were robbed one weekend, and they had the great flood another weekend, and the pipes burst. And then that just Monday week ago, I think it was, they were robbed again, but this time somebody whipped off with their work. So it looks like it's us, and we wouldn't be surprised at all if Jack... I mean, you can't help but think that Jack's possibly involved. And he's such a religious freak, and he's gone from... the pits of life to the serenity of seeing the light. And so he could easily resort to that, I think. Any of these people that go from one total extreme to another are a little dubious.

So things out there... they're fairly busy, well, they're very busy. I got a couple of new staff out there. A girl who does waxing and stuff, and a new guy called Kenny, who's a real country and western type, with, you know, real western shirts and boots and a big hat, and he's a hoot. Everything but his guitar.

We've been... oh, Bev and Jack have been to Colorado skiing with 26 kids. They took young Harry Olson, the youngest. He was 15 yesterday too. And he took all his friends out on Saturday night to a hockey game because, of course, we've got the big hockey star now in the Flames in Atlanta. The first night that he came after the big... the Olympic finish, he came to Atlanta the following Saturday night and played prior to his joining the Flames. They'd sold 7,000 tickets at the Omni, and by the time they knew that he was coming on the Saturday night, they'd completely sold out, a full house. I think it takes about 20,000. But they say that we'll lose the Flames ice hockey team anyway because ice hockey is just not... you know, there's just not enough spectator participation here that people just don't go and see it, even with this big new star. Who's made a fortune. You may have read in Sports Illustrated or Time magazine or whatever. The first week that he joined, he did one ad for Coke and got something like $200 or $30,000 just in one ad. And he's got all kinds of extra money other than his salary, which you might as well get because one's life expectancy in these things can never be guaranteed.

Anyway, so that... Of course, politics is real big right now. There's an awful lot going on on the political scene. And oh, well, Connally's just dropped out of the... out of the race. An interesting thing about Connally, he apparently has got a remarkable ability to raise finance, and he has raised, you know, $11 million or something for his campaign. And he just dropped out. Got one delegate and... or something, having spent $11 million. That's how sick this whole political scene is here, that he could spend that much money to get one delegate. They claim that if he'd gone ahead and continued to fight the battle right through, that he would have spent something like... at the rate he was going, he would have spent $300 million on his campaign, which just... it's sick, isn't it? I mean, goodness. Of course, we had a budget, or whatever they called it here, last week, and they put gas up another 10 cents and taxes and goodness knows what. And it mainly affects those people that use credit a lot, I saw, so it doesn't affect us one bit. And... what else? Oh yeah, young Harry had gone skiing with Bev and Jack based in... Cambridge? Time. And John was over talking to Eddie Olson yesterday while the boys were... the boy's home on spring vacation, Charles and Lewis from Harvard. And Charles is off to Eton next year, well, this year for the... I guess after summer, for a year. He's studied Greek history or something. And wouldn't it be nice to be able to send your children to the best schools in the world just for a year or so?And... anyway, they seemed to be okay over there. We thought they hadn't been doing very much, although the weekend of the snowstorm... John had gone over to... I don't know whether I told you that in the last tape. The Sunday that it snowed, Susie called John to see if he'd go over and light the fire, that they hadn't had a light in the lounge for a while, just to check that the chimneys weren't going to catch on fire. They were having a luncheon that day, and there were some men in tuxedos and goodness knows what running around preparing the food, getting everything organised. Her on the snow day! But her staff seemed to manage to get there. Well, it's Monday today, and last week was the last night of our creative writing class, which we really wasn't... my... it was fun, but it wasn't exactly... I guess... I don't know whether I... in fact that I had the flu so many times during the class and just never seemed to find the time to get it all together quite how I should have done. I feel I just didn't do a very good job of the whole deal, but you know, I guess I learned something, and I met some nice people anyway, and we had a lot of fun. But the teacher was so useless. I mean, she just got to the point where we were running the class ourselves, and we've all decided that if we got together once a month with our writings, that we'd have just as much use for one another as we did in the class. She got to the point where we'd all start discussing things and trying to be helpful to one another in class, and it'd come 9:30, and you could see her packing up, fidgeting, sort of ready to go but didn't know how to excuse herself. This is the teacher, I mean, you know, it was really rather silly. But tonight, one of the girls is having us all over to her house, and we're going to, you know, just a little social evening.

But there was apparently... the... one of the girls in the class... I guess it caused quite a stir. There were a couple of weeks where we had particular subjects which had caused quite a lot of interest, where you couldn't discuss the subject because we weren't there for that purpose. You know, it was the way it had been written. But one girl had been to a male strip club and had described that in great detail. And then we had to do an interview, and she went back and interviewed one of the strippers, which was quite fascinating. And then we had one girl who hardly came at all but, one night came and had written a story about how she had... well, virtually she didn't say this, but virtually boiled down to her having seen the light, and it had saved her marriage and oh dear and so on and so forth. And the rest of the class were just sort of seething with the ridiculousness of this particular story. But it was a typical, you know, religious thing. The guy Ward that owns the campers, he explained... he said, "You've heard of the Bible Belt?" He said, "Well, this is the buckle." And for sure it is. You know, these Baptists are real weird. I lump all Baptists together. They're not all the same, of course, but... I said at home, always the Baptists were considered slightly weird, but here you've got so many different kinds. And the sort that... you know, Jack that John used to work with, well, he's Pentecostal Unity Church, which is different again from just Pentecostal. So you know, they have their own little cliques. So on... but the Edwards, you know, next door to Bev and Jack, well, their first daughter got married last weekend. You know, they're Baptists, but they boiled on to being typical... You know, John had a bit of a funny thing with her. He didn't... you know, they're pretty tight when it comes to money. Their religion goes out the window when it comes to money. And he owed John quite a bit, and John had a little bit of trouble getting it out of them in the end. And which annoyed John because he'd paid him very low wages anyway, and he bloody knew it, you know. But they're typical. And with Jack, you know, they'd really just turn on you. They just haven't got an ounce of Christianity in them really. That's what's so upsetting. And... we're a bit weary now of any Baptists because as much as they hammer God and Jesus and all the rest of it at you, they're just as two-faced as can be. And you really do have to be quite careful of them, especially if you have business dealings with them here. They're real weird.

Anyway, what else has been happening on the civic scene? We have got... the chief of police has been re-elected, George Napper, I think his name is. And of course, he was because he's black, and so is the Mayor, so he naturally was going to re-elect him. And what else has been happening? Of course, we had Marvin Arrington was elected as president of the Council, and he's black, of course, and his kids... son's class with Rachael. I think I might have told you, but Rachael came home to tell us that Marvin Arrington Jr. was just thrilled that his father was president because he's getting a lot of publicity, and he just likes that. They don't... they're not like Whitman's forward, but Marvin Arrington was at the children's production at the PTO the other night of Hansel and Gretel, which was very well done. Little Matthew next door had played the part of narrating the whole thing and did a very good job.

Rachael was just so happy in this class. Mrs... Miss First, the lady spelled F-U-R-S-T, is a real dark Southern belle. And she talks just like... she's so sweet as can be. And Sunny and I... Sunny's a really quite a nice person next door, and she's sort of very down to earth, and she believes that so much of the 'free American way' is about as free as being, you know, imprisoned. But... she was... we were talking about Valentine's Day. You know, they just go bananas on Valentine's Day, and everyone's getting hearts and flowers to one another. All the Americans sent thousands and thousands of Valentine's Day cards to the Canadians. Oh boy.

Well, that was about an hour and a half ago, that little knock at the door. It was my friendly Anne Marie. You remember me telling you about Amway? Well, that's his wife. And she came up because I had, first of all, sponsored her in an aerobic dancing thing to raise money for cancer or heart or something... Heart Foundation, I think it was the other week. Came to collect her money because I haven't been down at the 'Y' doing my exercises. And also, of course, to sell me a few more Amway products which I can't live without, I'm sure. Anyway, so we chatted for a while and obviously... And here I am, about eating a nectarine and with another yet another cup of coffee. And where was I? Oh, Valentine's and hearts and flowers were dropped. Well, Sunny said, you know, this was a good example of what some Americans are like and what Miss First is like. One day she had little Amanda in the classroom, and Miss First said to her, "Amanda, you just look the sweetest little thing that I've ever seen. You look like you just stepped out of a storybook. Didn't she look so sweet?" And Sunny thought, "Oh, my goodness." But she said, you know, she was rather proud. She thought, too, that Amanda looked rather cute with her little ribbon and her wee pretty dress and everything. And Sunny had gone to known trouble to have Amanda look sweet. And she said she went off and was doing something else in the classroom, and somebody else came in with their little girl, and Miss First was just telling her how, "Wee, you know, she just looked like she stepped straight out of a storybook." And Sunny said, "Talk about a compliment falling flat." But that's what they're like, you know. They really... Ruthy was like that, you know. Anyway, so you just take all that with a grain of salt, but she's really sweet. She thinks these kids are cute, and she breeds gerbils, if you please. And we are about to get the litter of gerbils time. Rachael's that excited about it. Beverly's given us the little cage that the gerbils will live in. And Miss First actually said to me... she said, "As far as I'm concerned," she said, "rodents are rodents." But she said, "Don't you dare tell my children." She said, "They think I just adore them." And so she creates this illusion with the kids that she adores these little rodents.

Anyway, what else is news? Well, sidetracked again. It's now Friday, must be the 21st, does it reach? Yep, it's the 21st, and I didn't know... it's spring... the kids are on spring holiday. They went to school Tuesday, and then since then, they've been on holiday. And we're all just sitting around now having breakfast, and shortly we're going swimming at the 'Y'. We've gone for five days... we've been swimming every single day for the last five days. We're back into the swimming. See, here comes Maitland in his sleeping bag with his little head poking out the top. Hi Maitland. Oh, he ain't too happy. It didn't record. I see you sigh. Okay, here we are on side two, and I guess I'd better backtrack a little bit, just fill you in on the week, and then the kids can have a chatter to you. First of all, on Tuesday, we went to the Superior Court with Rachael's class. I ended up taking three little black children: who were they Rachael? Lewis, Marvin Arrington Jr., and there was George Shes, and there was Teresa... What's that? Teresa, I think her name was. All little black kids. They were real cute. It's quite fun to touch their hair; it's like wire, I did. I keep touching them on the head because they kept holding my hair there anyway. So we went to the Superior Court, and who did we have morning tea with, Rachael? The judge of...? What? We had morning tea... cookies, Kool-Aid, Kool-Aid... and the secret about her good... the judge's secretary may call they... The secret about it was it had... it was grape and strawberry mixed together because she didn't have enough grape or enough strawberry. And his wife made the... yeah, there was probably about 30 there, and they were all gone. They sure were. There must have been at least 60 cookies, darling, because there were 30 kids, and I reckon there was at least two cookies each, was there not? No, five! Five cookies each! God, judge's wife must have been baking for...? One boy ate 17! Oh, Federal state really? I didn't see that. He must have never stopped eating! That was Jason, really. Oh well, we went into the judge's office for morning tea, but we'd been in the court prior to that, and there was a just a minor case, a case against Marta of some girl that had a parking lot downtown. They were trying to find something a little more juicy for us, but three of the boys in Rachael's class misbehaved, Matthew situation wouldn't be quiet. They were dangling their feet and knocking the seats, so we couldn't go back in. And so we just went... as the elevator... ready to leave... we were about to leave, and a very handsome DA came along and said, "What are you... what were you looking for?" And it happened that he recognized Miss First. And he said, "Oh, you're married to a doctor?" And she fluttered her eyelashes in the usual Miss First fashion, said, "Why, no, I'm a widow." And he looked absolutely embarrassed. And then he said, "Oh, you know, what can I help you with?" She said, "What we'd really like is an empty courtroom so that we could... I'll take pictures." So he finds us an empty courtroom where, in fact, a jury was just out in the jury room, and the kids all tear in. And he said, "Well now, they mustn't sit up on the magistrate... on the judge's chair." And all the kids tearing in take over the jury stand and so on. And he said, "Oh, you know, they've... did not get up there..." And Miss First said, "Why, my children ain't just ordinary children. My children are gifted!" As though, you know, they're going to be judges one day anyway, so we might as well start right now. And the DA said, "Oh, these children are gifted," and sort of... she just gets away with murder, this woman. Anyway, so then this guy was real cute. I think he rather fancied Miss First, and he put on a complete act for us. It took almost an hour. And every kid was in... a juror or defendant or a witness or prosecution or whatever, and he helped them, and they acted out a complete little trial, which was most interesting. But it was quite cute at the very end. Did you hear him, Rachael, when he said, "Now, I don't want to see any of you children back here for any reason other than to come and see it like you did that date." Didn't want to see anyone in any trouble. And he said... and he'd explained what stealing was about. And he said, "Now, I don't want to hear about any of that now. None of you would steal anything, would you?" And two... one little boy says, "Sounds so... stole my dictionary." Jeff said, "Jason stole his dictionary." Jeff's father came... He was explaining how it worked, the crime system works, and where everyone sits, how the jury works in the court. And he had to have one defendant who stole the... who stole something from somebody. And Jason was the defendant. And Jeff was the person who the dictionary was stolen from. So, "Jeff... Jason stole my dictionary!" We had a really good day at the court, didn't we, Rachael? Then we came back to school.

And then on Wednesday was our first day off on holiday. What did we do on Wednesday? Wednesday, we must have...? That's right. And then Becky came around. Oh, we had a little... what's her name? To stay for the night, didn't we? Becky's little girl, Ashley left? She came to stay the night. Becky and... oh yeah, but she stayed the night and all the next day. That was Wednesday. We went swimming, and we played... we had a good time. Becky came for lunch. And then on Thursday, yesterday, you all went down to Matthew's for breakfast. And then you and I went to clean campers for the day. You forgot to tell something. Okay, we went down to Matthew's, and we were meant to have breakfast before nine, and we were going to go swimming at nine o'clock, like normal. But Stan wasn't organized for everybody that rushed down there and had breakfast. And so we ended up having breakfast at 11 o'clock. Had a...? Whirling? And I enough... we went to campers, a busy day. And I helped Mum. Instead, she's going to pay me. Then... he wanted me to go buy some... scraps? To make some cake? No, that wasn't scraps, darling. We're not down to the scraps yet. I wanted you to go and buy some sponge from the cake shop so we could make trifle. Oh yeah, scrap. You're quite right, darling. They're just little scraps of sponge they take. Yeah, when they're making the big wedding cakes. That wasn't strong... wedding cakes? They make weddings out of sponges? Can you believe that? Yeah, and you went and got there, and I came back and said to Mum, "When I went to the bakery, I smelled all the plain donuts cooking." And I came out and said, "I was just..." See, Mum gave me the whole purse because we didn't know how much the sponge cake was. So, then we got down there... I got down there, and I smelled all the things. And so then I said I was just about to sneak some money and buy a donut, but I didn't, and came back and told Mum what happened. Then she told me I could go down and buy donuts. So I went down and bought a donut, and it was all gone by the time I got back. So I ate it. How many... how many campers did we clean yesterday, Rach? Six. Six? And it took us five hours. Five hours, that's right. And before we started, on the way to the camper place, Mum got me a drink. And she got herself two coffees. She drank so much coffee. Now, she got two coffees. And she already had one coffee in the car, so that was three. And then we did all the campers and got the donuts, and after that, we went back when it was time for me to go to choir. Oh no, and I missed it. So we missed it. And we went to Wendy's again and got a hamburger for lunch. And then we came back. Before we left... that was at 3:30. You had a very late lunch, 3:30. At 3:30, the man said, "You got another camper?" And we said, "You didn't put it on the list?" You know anybody...? And he said, "Yes, I did." So I couldn't find the list, but he didn't put it on. You've been checking the list off, Rachael. That wasn't on there. So we... Mum started to drive me to Wendy's for lunch. And so then we went to Wendy's, and I got a hamburger, and Mum got two more coffees, so that was five coffees. And then we came back... 178 and a three... birthday party taking place on Friday night with 94 cent Stroh's beer and kamikazes and free balloons and toys fit for a three-year-old. That's Friday night at the Harvest Moon Saloon. Sunday night... Moon Saloon... a full moon party. It's going to be a wild one with 94 cent Miller Lite beer. The costume theme's the Marx Brothers, so keep in mind all these things. Wednesday at the Moon Shadow, Friday at the Harvest Moon, and Sunday at the Harvest Moon. Pete... Lindbergh... Market... Johnson Road... Cliff Craig Ashwood... 94 Q went up... we went... those noises come out though. We went swimming after that. Okay, tell Nana... tell her about the woman who came rushing in, told the Chinese man that his pies taste... Oh, she came rushing back, and she'd already bought some honey cakes. She went out to her car. I didn't notice that at first, but she'd been in and bought one of these little honey cakes. Then she went out to her car, and she obviously... she was a great big round lady, and she must have consumed that one fell swoop. And she liked that, so she came back, and she'd obviously bought a great big giant one, which, you know, a really big one. And she got out to her car and obviously that one wasn't so good. So she came back in. The Chinese guy hardly spoke English. This is a domestic Chinese store. And she said to him, "You know what stale means?" And he sort of didn't, you know, of course. And she said, "Oh, tastes bad," you know, and pointed to these things. And he said, "Ah, you bring back, bring back, bring back." So she brought them back, and he just exchanged them for four others. But I was laughing; she obviously would have consumed this whole brick cake before she even got home again. Small one it exchanged. That's right anyway.

What else has been happening? That was... that's all that happened. And then we went swimming from 6:30 to 7:30 last night. And... I didn't know. What have you got to tell Nana, Maitland? Maitland? Well, what else has happened? Oh dear. Shall I tell Nana about what happened to you in school, Maitland? Yes. Yes. About me? What they... You want to tell... you tell her about your book. What's it called? What's it about? It's the latest book out. And it's the Encyclopedia of Aviation. And he is thrilled to bits. You know, Uncle David's planes probably on there, boy. You know that it is. And I want to... because they told me... like Uncle David's... Tell what happened to me. That... that was on Tuesday, darling, after I got back from the field trip. Under... nerves haven't had four kids in the car. And that's not Uncle David's boy. That one's got little bicycle wheels on. Uncle David's got a little bit newer than that one. Anyway. And then I got home, and Sunny had called in the morning. My neighbour. And she had suspected that Amanda had chickenpox first thing in the morning. So I called her to see if she wanted anything from the store or whatever. We were sitting having a peaceful cup of coffee, and the telephone rang. The school said Matthew had fallen over. Could we please come and get him? We suspected that Matthew was overreacting because when Matthew doesn't get his own way, he clenches his fist, braces himself, grits his teeth together, and flies his fist through the air at potential... So what I suspected had happened was that he had done this and hit a goal post or something for his hand because it's always flown through the air. Then Uncle David's Cessna. Yeah, that probably is Uncle David's Cessna. Maitland found yours on page 44. And then we got him, and he was taken to the Piedmont... Well, Sunny took him to the doctor, and the doctor thought something was wrong. And then he went to the Piedmont Hospital. And they took an X-ray and found it was broken. So he had to miss soccer practice and was taken out of soccer because he has to have it on for six weeks. And he got it plastered and came to soccer practice. That's right, you can be playing soccer, but your first game last week was cancelled, which was rather lucky, Rachael, wasn't it? Didn't tell Nana about that. And then... it was brought home. Then he started... when we were having breakfast, he started overacting. He said he couldn't get his clothes off when he really could. And then one time, I forgot what day now... Mum said that we're all gonna have to be more careful of him and watch out for him and help him. So he just bangs until Amanda... wants her to just get out of the way. He thinks he could just walk through everything, and everyone's gonna get out of the way for him. But it didn't happen. And he knocked poor Amanda over onto the furniture. She's only four. And then... Saturday, when our game was cancelled, what day was that Mum? Saturday? You were in the choir last Saturday. Yeah, when we had the choir. I've told Nana about that. A game was cancelled. But... because the fields are too muddy. Because it had just rained Friday night too. So they're knocked... and on Windsor Park where that's a big gray area of the... area. And so that was cancelled, and I was going because I didn't want to miss the game and the other girls get to play it. That was good. And they say they were playing... We were gonna play the Bad News Bears. Bad news... we were... you both playing? Because a girls' team are the Bad News Bears, and the boys' team like beats the boys. Your phantom of these... pig. Yeah, what sort of airplane is that, boy? That's called a Lockheed Lightning. Now lightning... Lockheed, one of the most famous American fighters of World War II. The twin-engine P-38 single-seat Lightning had an unusual design with a visualized pod for the pilot centered in the wing between two Allison engines. That's a strange... airplane board? And now left this book. We had to go to the library without him yesterday. And so we had to choose his book for him. And he always likes us bringing a book home for him because you get excited, don't you boy, when you don't know what it's going to be about. And this one, you really like. This Saturday coming up, we gonna play the Angels. So... that it's going to be pretty hard to keep their uniforms clean because their uniforms are white, so that's going to be kind of strange. Well, I don't know what else to say. Mum might have to talk. The Russians aren't necessarily bad people... born talking... The Russians but communist people favor... they're like us, you know, they nuts. The Russians, but they built a big helicopter, boy. New galaxies. Oh, Maitland's wrapped in this book. Uncle David will have to get it for his birthday. No. You get one... the little cousin Stephen... we got a model body that shows the inside the body you... Nana, you... and we saved and worked by picking up pine cones for 25 cents a shopping bag for... And we soon just picked up four bags and decided we hated that job. So then we just started earning money some other way. So then we earned up $6... something I forgotten now. $6.95? Was $6.65. And then we went to buy the body, which was only $4.05. And that was $4.61 after we paid tax. And then we went to the store, the Magic Market, and bought these waste suckers. You know how sometimes on the ground you find little plastic things with a hump on the top, and they fit like a ring? They don't think they find them in New Zealand, darling, because they... here Nana must have seen them. They're rings then... just tell Nana they're rings... that rings either... they have big diamonds which are suckers, and you suck them... look like babies' dummies. Brother bought one each for 25 cents. And then we left and still had quite a bit of money left, and we're starting to save again. And I'm... what we...? Did you see that, boy? Did you want most...? Rubber snake? A rubber snake? And you believe anyone? I want to save it for a rubber snake. And so he got that. And the book I got from the library was the book called 'B and Fancy'. Fantasy? And it's about all the movie stars, and it has pictures from when they were born to when... right up to Joe DiMaggio? There goes the Hollywood... they... who did you find in there, Rachael, when they were young? Well, I found Dorothy on The Wizard of Oz. You told Nana what Dorothy's real name was? Frances Gumm. What you... In this book, they had a picture of when they were young and their real name and what they changed their name to. But Elizabeth Taylor didn't change her name, and she was cute when she was a baby. And... Who else did you find then? There's some bar... French lady, and her name was... she's Chinese? Chinese wrong. Luong? And she turned her name to Anna May Wong. That's an air shock forward? There's bunch of across the Atlanta here is Qantas, the place in this book, and it's called 'The Girl Can't Help It' and it... Oh, I don't want to tell it. It's called 'The Girls Can't Help It'. And you know, they think of something else to show me and it... and like he wants to see it. Baylights Playboy magazine? There's lots of things in here, and they tell all the famous movie stars. There's a place you could pick out the movie star. Pick out the star, and they show you two pictures. And one of the people have been changed to a normal old person. You got to guess which picture is the true movie star and which one's not. And it's really kind of hard if you don't know the movie stars. But I got through it and finished the book.

Well, I finished put on pauses because we were getting rather tired of that dribble. Just this one little bit here. Well, poor old Maitland, we had a bit of trouble with him last week. He came home one night, and he said, "Oh, I've been moved in the class." And I said, "Oh, have you, Maitland? Where are you sitting?" And he said, "Oh... you know, just by myself." And I said, "Well, you're not sitting out by the television, are you?" And he said, "Yes." And I said, "Are you sitting with...?" He said, "Jason." And I think I've told you about Jason. The teacher couldn't put Jason with anyone because he was just so naughty. I knew something had happened. I said, "Matt, what way are you facing?" And he said, "I'm facing the kindergarten." And there isn't a whole lot for learning very much facing the kindergarten because you can't even see the blackboard. Okay, so that was all right. The next morning, I went to see Miss First about something about this field trip we were going on. So John decided to go and see Miss Mormon. And then when I'd finished with Miss First, I came back. Well, Miss Mormon and Maitland and John were all hovering round then. There was me, and all the kids in the class were watching, and they obviously knew something real big was up for both parents to be there. And poor Maitland was real upset, as Norman said, "Now, Maitland, you tell your parents why you've been moved." And Maitland finally had to say that he had just... what was the problem, Rach? Maitland, you weren't...? What were you doing? You weren't what? Yeah, he just shrugs his shoulders. What was the word? You know. Just a shame that... what did you tell me you weren't? You weren't...? Well, come on down now, exactly what it was... hurry up, get on the tape, hurry up, boy. It's kind of almost mouthful of toast, Rach? Shall we say? He wouldn't cooperate, that's what he said. So he was moved, which is the only way to cope with somebody that won't cooperate, isn't it? He says 'cooperate'. Anyway. So he got moved that must have been when... was that, Rach? Last Friday? And then we had a test after... he had his first math test, and home it came. And he got... what is it? 29%, which was awful. It was a very similar experience to the first spelling test, a complete, complete blockout. It was all plus, but he just didn't want it, and he got... I think he got two right. And you...? Ran? Three got right? I'm sorry, must have been... you must have got... That's right, because there must have been 35 questions or something. Anyway, we had a long discussion about it in Maitland agreed that he was not cooperating, and they had another test just a few days later. And how many did you get, Maitland? How many make one live here? 100! Let's hear it for Maitland! He got 100. He was very proud. And the very same day, what else happened, boy? Oh, you got spelling test? How many did you get in the spelling? 100! But you also got moved in the class again, didn't you? What...? Where'd you go? Back with your friend. Back to the middle of...? Back to his little girlfriends where he... who are you sitting before? Susan? No. Cary? Oh, she knows her used to be in second grade, didn't you? No, that was another school. Oh, don't talk rubbish, Rachael. Anyway, so Maitland's on the straight and narrow again actually, one. And... anyway, what else is news? Bang? We... this one... guess what, Nana? The sweater you sent fits. And can wear? Yeah, can wear for his... what? Week? And the sweater fits real good, and it looks super. We showed Vicky when she came, and she likes it too. They're really nice, and that's a good size. It'll fit you really... still fit you well next winter, so that's super. And we'll still get some weather now that we can wear it. So we're real pleased to have it in time because it's funny, the weather's real weird. One day it's hot, and the next day it's cold. It's springtime. The spring flowers are popping out, but we'll still get cold days. So, and it's a great little jacket, doesn't it, Rach? Well, what's been happening in the garden, Rachael? You've got to watch the garden at the moment, don't you? Make one... can I be your boyfriend? I... How is coming? Stephen? Cousin Stephen? You like cousin Stephen, don't you boy? Huh? Because he's your boy cousin. And what have you been up to with Matthew the Bay? I spent the last three times, Lisa. You've spent the night with Matthew? Can you sleep at his house? Don't interrupt. Where do you sleep? In his bed. And where does he sleep? Now it's a free...? And doesn't it boy? He gives you his bed, and he sleeps on the floor. Are you good at Matthew's? Now, what about basketball? Are you good at basketball? Can you dribble? Well, come on, talk to Nana and Grandad about something still. Tell them, hurry up, tape's nearly finished. I went to Matthew's, we had breakfast, and then we played and Rachael, we were using something of hers. And we're using it as an an... and Rachael... sorry. And we were using it... Ben name a fist? And Rachael took it off us. And then the screen? She took it? Oh. And then me and Matthew were trying to then her... Matthew and I are trying to...? What were you doing with the amethyst, boy? What are you getting together of that collection? And were you putting the names on them? And we used his last...? Why he had...? Did you want your little rub-off letters to put on the rocks? Were you putting the names right on the rocks? Yeah. And Rachael made him the last laugh for no reason. You've just... all you've done is tell tales, Maitland? Why don't you tell Nana and Grandad something happy? You don't want to do that very much this morning. What about swimming? How are you going swimming? Good? He likes swimming. I could swim past our YMCA pool and the water with no... no breath.